Breathe
by X3MonochromeX3
Summary: After the loss of their son, Richard and Raven struggle to keep afloat.


**I am very fond of this couple and it is my first time writing anything for them and for this this fandom. Naturally I am a little nervous. This piece is a bit angsty, but I think it gets better.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans. If I did Raven and Robin would have ended up together.**

The loss of their son affected them both deeply, but he worried about Raven. She did not cry, not when they found their baby still and unresponsive in his crib, or when they lowered his little body into the cold ground. He understood that the lack of tears were not an expression of apathy, he knew that in her own way she was grieving. That she still was.

After their son's funeral they could hardly stand to see one another, it was too painful for Raven to see Richard, a reminder of what they had and what they lost. And Richard did not know what to say, how to act, how to _help._

He wished that she would let him in, to share her pain and her anger. He was afraid that he would not be able to pull her from her grief.

 _The strands of hair that managed to escape from the messy bun on top of her head clung the sides of her sweaty face. Her cheeks were flushed from the effort of pushing, and although she was spend from twelve hours of labor, her eyes shine with joy and love for the marvel in her arms._

 _She was so lovely, so fucking beautiful, that that it made Richard want to cry._

 _"He looks like you," she said, tracing a gentle finger along her son's perfect little nose, "I'm almost jealous."_

 _He smiled and gave her a sweet kiss on the lips. "What did I ever do to deserve you? How can I ever thank you?"_

 _"For what?"_

 _"For loving me, for giving me a son."_

 _She looked at him with so much love and affection, her eyes telling him everything her words usually failed to express._

 _"I think you got it wrong," she started, resting her free hand gently on his, "I should be thanking you. You brought me back from hell, if it hadn't been for you and your inability to accept defeat we wouldn't be here at all."_

 _He brought his mouth to hers once again, a little more passionate and less sweet this time but no less sincere. She had given him everything he could ever want and more, and in that moment he knew that nothing could be more perfect than the family they had build for themselves._

Six days after their baby's death Raven broke down in tears.

He found her on their baby's empty room. She was staring into the vacant crib her with baby boy's blue blanket held close to her chest.

"Raven?"

She did not turned to acknowledge him, and the silence stretched for several minutes. When he was about to reach for her and walk her back to their room she broke the silence.

"I didn't think of giving him his blanket. What if he is cold Richard?"

"Raven it's okay-"

"It's not okay Richard! I'm his mother I should of known, what good is a baby blanket with no baby! I should of taken better care of him, I should of-"

He cut her off, burrowing her face into his chest and holding her close. He could feel her tears dampening his shirt. He swallowed the lump in his throat, he needed to be strong for her.

"You took good care of him, Raven. What happened wasn't your fault. Okay?"

"It's not fair," she said, her voice weak defeated. "I love my baby. Why him?"

She continue to sob into his embrace and they sank to the ground. She tried to control her tears but they would not stop.

"I don't know." He said, his eyes burning with emotion. She wrapped her arms around him and returned his embrace, sobbing harder.

Her sobs eventually subsided and her tears slowed. He thought that she had succumbed to sleep due to exhaustion when she startled him.

"My milk dried up today. Sometimes I would turn on the baby monitor and hope to hear him cry for me." She had thought that she had ran out of tears, but more flowed from her eyes. "But he will never cry for me again. I don't want to accept that."

"We have to." He said, his heart breaking for her.

"It hurts. I don't think it will ever stop."

"I know."

It was the first time since their son died that she let him hold her through the night.

 **This was not proof-read by anybody else, so I apologize for any mistakes. Hope to hear from you guys!**


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